Feeble Is As Feeble Reads!

Ms. Michele Thompson of Seniors for Living has published a list of 53, count them, FIFTY THREE things that in her opinion get better with age. I won't include the explanations she offered as to WHY she thinks these particular 53 things get better with age. Ga'head, read them yourself, let them wash over you (along with an occasional comment from me in red) and see if you're in agreement with her. Frankly, my Dear Ms. Thompson, I think you're stretching ..... really stretching:

1. Wisdom ~ okay
2. Life stories ~ not necessarily
3. Emotional stability ~ uh huh
4. Body image ~ oy
5. Brain games
6. Vocabulary ~ I'm in agreement here, whew!
7. Attention
8. Problem-solving skills
9. Expert knowledge
10. Self-awareness
11. Patience
12. Self-esteem
13. Resilience - and the alternative would be....?
14. Acuity
15. Common sense ~ come on, if you have it now, you probably had it when you were 20.
16. Admiration
17. Humor
18. Muscle maturity ~ yeah, also teeth maturity, bone maturity, FLESH maturity, etc.
19. Sports training ~ what ever she's smoking, I want some
20. Marriage
21. Sex ~ what ever she's injecting, I want some
22. Family ~ living or dead?
23. Grand kids
24. Friendships
25. Networking
26. Fido and Fluffy ~ you mean PETS?
27. The love and appreciation of others
28. Cheese ~ okay, now we're talkin
29. Eggs ~ you mean before they're cracked?
30. Beef
31. Casseroles ~ huh?
32. Liquors ~ good one
33. Cookbooks
34. Cooking skills
35. Seedlings
36. Fruit trees
37. Shade trees
38. Gardens and fields
39. Soil ~ aren't 36 thru 39 the same things?
40. Compost ~ wow, is this bitch reaching or what?
41. A bird's song ~ c o m e o n lady!
42. Antiques and collectibles
43. Style
44. Real estate ~ this used to be true
45. Diversified investment portfolios
46. Money-saving perks ~ oh yeah? you mean senior discounts at the movies? LOL!
47. Leather
48. Sheets ~ jeeeez, is she serious here?
49. Clothing
50. Classic cars and sports cars
51. Scrapbooking or photo album collections
52. Educational travel opportunities
53. Collection of mementos

Can't believe she missed the obvious. One of the things that really does USUALLY get better with age, but not ALWAYS... WINE!! So much for my patience. People like this need to be slapped. She sat at her computer and thought this stuff up and then published it for feeble minded people to read. Ugggggg... Okay, now I'm compelled to sit down and write a list of my own. One hundred and one things that make me want to strangle other people, perhaps? Watch for the post. In the interim, send me your thoughts on this. Am I the only one that needs a martini after reading such tripe? Help me out here, people.

1 comment:

  1. #20 Marriage. Um, I was married for nearly 19 years, 'til I found my ex was having an affair with his office manager. Was our marriage good after that many years? Nope. Would it have improved if he'd prostrated himself (after I castrated him) and I'd given him another chance to -- shall we say? -- screw up??? I'm not a betting girl, but methinks not. If it may or may not improve, rather than being a guarantee, it shouldn't be on the list. Gingerbread gets better with age, but not too much age or it gets either stale or moldy. Not too sure 'bout anything else ....


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